Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize