I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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