what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize