Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize