why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
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