so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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