ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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