there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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