thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3