There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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