Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
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We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
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Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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