can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
