Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
33 Sex Crazed People That Are Going Balls Deep
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
21 Family Members Confess The Creepiest Things They Know About a Relative
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?