I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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