Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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