last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize