Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
