I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
