Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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