it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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