I want to stick my p in your. b.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
