Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...