Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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