xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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