glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
