yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
