he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
