"it" just moved
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
