How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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