god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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