What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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