I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
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i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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