I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
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i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
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I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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