I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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