Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I was not drunk enough for that final.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize