im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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