Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
where are you?
Hypothermia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize