Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize