you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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