Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize