i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
