He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
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Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
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Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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