you guys were way drunker than both of me
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
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I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
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Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?