Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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