she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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