think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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