the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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