How'd it feel making her break her religion?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize