Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i just made my gag reflex go away.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
my shit smells like andre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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