I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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